三木

三木

要具体的,不要抽象的。

Essay (2024.4)

Day after day of headaches.
Yesterday, my mentor told me that sometimes he feels that we are very pitiful and painful. People who are not good at socializing do not like to participate in crowded places, nor do they like fake people and things. But they also have their own way of socializing. We talked a lot, thought a lot, and recorded it incidentally.

Why do the older generation not have their own pursuits#

Today, my friend and I discussed this issue, why are parents nowadays so eager to have their children get married and have children, as if only in this way can their lives be fulfilled.
The contradictions in the older generation's marriage concepts reflect the complexity of societal values. On one hand, they hope their children find a partner who genuinely treats them well, while on the other hand, they emphasize the importance of matching social status. This is the friction between traditional beliefs and real-life situations.
When we pursue pure emotions, we talk about "matching social status" and being realistic.
When we only pursue desires, we mention "responsibility" and "marriage".
College students date, but parents are anxious. To be honest, in terms of educating children, parents often focus on overprotection rather than providing enough challenges and opportunities for them to learn to cope. This "overprotection" leads to children feeling incompetent and having a tendency to avoid facing setbacks. Why do parents always help children avoid these things? Although they may avoid them this time, the next time the child will have to pay a higher price to face them. The earlier one experiences setbacks, the better one can improve their ability to face challenges.

Why are young people nowadays unwilling to have children#

Actually, the main reason is that the cost of having children is too high. Formula, education, etc. Because they do not trust domestic formula, they need to buy expensive imported formula. Because they do not trust domestic education, they need to study abroad. The expenses are unbearable for ordinary people. If there is no house abroad, they can only return to their home country as a returnee.
This is not anxiety and complaints from the peasant class, but more of an unchangeable fact.
Imagine:

  • People live and work in peace, workers receive satisfactory wages. Companies also comply with labor laws, not making money by exploiting employees, not relying on blessings but on their own technology, patents, and innovations.
  • Children are born without worrying about food safety, without worrying about technology and hard work.
  • Going to school without worrying about campus bullying, parents not having to consider their relationship with teachers, absolute fairness, not worrying about the faculty and ranking of key schools.
  • No need to compare education, salary, or respectability. The cost of education expenses greatly reduced, no need to adhere to this elite education.

Some people think it's a money issue. As long as you earn enough money, you can solve everything and live a good life. In reality, domestic money cannot provide a stable life. The opportunities to make money now, even the opportunities to make money by doing real work, are not as good as gambling. Only when you earn more than 10 million can you live more comfortably.
But apart from the extremely intelligent elite students from Tsinghua and Peking University, most people are ordinary. A very small number of people earn money with their brains, while more rely on "luck". For example, the computer wave ten years ago, and more recently, WEB 3.0.
As the saying goes, small fortunes come from hard work, big fortunes come from fate.

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